1. Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead
of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me either. Just pretty much
leave me the hell alone.
2. The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt
and leaky tire.
3. It's always darkest before dawn. So if you're going to steal
your neighbor's newspaper, that's the time to do it.
4. Don't be irreplaceable. If you can't be replaced, you can't be
promoted.
5. Always remember that you're unique. Just like everyone
else.
6. Never test the depth of the water with both feet.
7. If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple
of car payments.
8. Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their
shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have
their shoes.
9. If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for
you.
10. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to
fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.
11. If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it
was probably worth it.
12. If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember
anything.
13. Some days you're the bug; some days you're the
windshield.
14. Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.
15. The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half
and put it back in your pocket.
16. A closed mouth gathers no foot.
17. Duct tape is like 'The Force'. It has a light side and a dark
side, and it holds the universe together.
18. There are two theories to arguing with women. Neither one
works.
19. Generally speaking, you aren't learning much when your lips
are moving.
20. Experience is something you don't get until just after you need
it.
21. Never miss a good chance to shut up.
22. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative
on the same night.
23. It is sometimes best to keep your mouth shut
and let people think you are a fool then open it and let them know they are
right.
Thanks Mom!
Copyright©2006 Robin L. Olson, Robin's Web, All Rights Reserved.
